Twitter Timewarp Tuesday #26

Laurel, this is pointless. Why don’t you just stop?

Because TWOOT.

Let’s face it: Socrates was banging all of his students.

They would come by in a pickup truck and just swipe everyone’s bags of garbage. It was creepy. My garbage was pretty entirely food packaging and kleenexes, so joke’s on them.


All the Disney Princesses are teenagers as well. What’s with so many animators being ephebophiles and/or zoophiles? I’m looking at you, anime.

Remember when Alf had that horrible talk show? Still better than Jimmy Fallon, though.

I forgive you for your chocolate with actual chocolate in it. Also those fizzy candies that are really good. You’re alright England.

A dove is a pigeon with good PR.

Remember Battle of the Network Stars? You’re getting old.

Really? A denim vest with the patches pinned on? Why do people do this?

But, yeah, keep doing the all-bacon paleo thing. Any diet that says you can eat all the bacon you want has to be a lie.